Have you ever told a little white lie?  I bet you have.  We all have and culturally it is accepted as a part of our lives and communication.  

Culturally it’s ingrained in us because you don’t want to hurt anyone else’s feelings.  It’s amazing how often we all go to the little white lie to get us out of so many things.  Going out when we don’t want to, not answering the phone when someone calls, telling people we are busy when in actuality we are just not in the mood to talk or go anywhere and on and on.

It’s an excuse so we don’t actually have to deal with the truth of a situation.

This is the place we give away our power everytime we tell a little white lie.

We are also told that it’s not that big of a deal to tell a little white lie.  Although, actually it’s a Big Deal!

Any time we give our power away it’s a big deal.  It takes a hit to our self-worth. It affirms the pattern of not speaking our truth and it keeps us in our head and out of our heart. 

We have been taught that the little white lie is compassion, it’s “being nice”  kind of like the phrase “bless her heart”.  Are you getting my drift here?

This came to my attention a couple months ago when I told a little white lie to someone I care very much about.  I didn’t want to hurt her feelings by telling her how I was feeling.

The problem with this is I’ve been doing a tremendous amount of deep work around owning my power.  As you begin to see areas you are giving away your power, it is important to clean it up and call your power back. It then becomes harder to give away your power.

Once expanded, you can’t go back. You can’t unsee what you have seen.

I felt an immediate pit in my stomach.  I couldn’t believe how bad I felt for giving away my power.  I couldn’t shake this pit in my stomach.  

It was this physical question of do you really want to fully own your power? My answer was YES!  The knowing within me said “then fix it”.

I had to clean it up with them.  I had to speak my truth and apologize.

The minute we talked and I apologized the sinking feeling left my stomach.  They gave me a hug and said they completely understood and thanked me for being honest with them.

This is the thing.  When we can speak our truth with compassion and grace from our HEART.  It touches their heart.  It’s clean and we all know where we stand.

It is powerful! 

When we speak our truth from out heart our selfworth is affirmed, we stay in our integrity, we don’t have to keep track of what we have said, which by the way keeps us out of our hearts and in our heads. 

I recently had a conversation with a friend and she asked me how I was feeling about a situation.  Part of me wanted to say everything was fine but it wasn’t.  I spoke my truth from my heart. As I did I held my breath for a moment anticipating the response. 

The response was beautiful and she thanked me for trusting her enough to share how I was feeling. We had a beautiful conversation after that and I felt even closer to my friend. She also stayed in her power. She felt trusted and I felt heard.  We both felt loved.  This is a win win that happens when two people can own and stay in their power.

I felt a peace.  I stayed in my power this time.  No little white lie.

It can be hard to tell our truth because it’s so engrained in each of us to avoid judgement, anger, and confrontation from others. 

When we stay in our power and speak our truth from our hearts there is room to seek understanding before judgement, to hear another’s perspective before anger, to have a conversation before confrontation.

This is our sacred heart power.  Each of us and our World needs this right now.

I am on a mission to give up the little white lie!  Will you join me?