Have you ever built up the courage to share your dream with someone only to immediately get dismissed or told it’s impossible or ridiculous?

I have done this on several occasions.

When this happens to you, it’s easy to get discouraged or start negotiating down your dreams. Making them a little more realistic or in alignment with what others feel comfortable with.

It’s interesting…

When I wrote my Children’s books, they sat in my file drawer for years until one day I felt called to see a speaker named Mark Hoog. Mark told my story through his own. The dream of publishing my own series of Children’s books was once again alive. I garnered the courage to talk with him about my books and my dream. After several meetings, my dream became a reality. Mark Hoog published my Children’s Books http://myfriendlygiant.com.

When I speak at schools with my books, I always start out asking the group of children “Who has a dream in their heart?”.  The younger children K-3^rd all raise their hands. They are so much fun. They are dreamers! They have big beautiful dreams that they can’t wait to share. But the higher you go in age groups, the fewer hands go up. The smaller the dreams get. They have already started negotiating down their dreams.

Why does this happen?

When you share your dreams at a certain age, you start to get negative responses. There always seemed to be someone telling you that you can’t do it or it’s impossible. Someone may have laughed at your dreams and made you feel less than, or you may have gotten the insincere “that’s great”. These responses can totally make you doubt your dream and yourself. You also may have gotten the ever so helpful “be more realistic” response.

After a few of these, you start to negotiate your dreams. Making them smaller, more realistic, more tolerable for others.

Your dreams are precious. Dream big beautiful dreams. This is a world where anything is possible. Also, be smart about your dreams. I was at a training with one of the executives with Mary Kay Cosmetics who said something I never forgot, “Be careful who you share your dreams with. If you have a 20×20 dream don’t share it with a 10X10 thinker.”

This is so true. Protect your dreams and only share them with people who will support you and believe in you. Mary Kay said, “Shoot for the moon and even if you miss, you will land among the Stars!”. 

You have a dream. Don’t let it go. I had a young girl in 3^rd grade tell me she wanted to be able to play professional football. I encouraged her and told her if she has a dream in her heart, she has already been given the ability to achieve that dream. Think of how many people might have told her that her dream was impossible. I think about her often. The other day I saw on the news a story about a professional women’s football league being formed. Who knows, you may see her there one day.

As adults, we forget how to dream. One of the hardest questions for the people I work with to answer, is what do you want. It’s so much easier to talk about what you don’t want.

Make this year a time to say NO I will not negotiate my Dreams!

In doing so, here are a few tips to begin dreaming again and holding onto those dreams:

1. Take time to think. What do you want? Really want. If anything was possible and money was no object, what would you be doing? What would you have? Who would you want to become?
2. What were your dreams as a child? Start here. There is a lot of information there for you. Some of the dreams may not be something you want now, but what information is in there to guide you to new dreams? I dreamed of being a Veterinarian until I took my first biology class in High School. I had to dissect a frog. Yep, maybe not for me now, but my love of animals has never changed. I will never be without a house full of them!
3. Connect back with your Imagination. Remember when you could just daydream for hours? For me, it got me into a lot of trouble in school. This in turn really began to disconnect me from my imagination. Take some time to daydream a little. It’s doesn’t take much time. Take advantage of small pockets of time, make up stories about what is around you. I do this a lot in airports and traffic. Play with it. Have fun!
4. Share your Dream with people who will hold it with you. Pick the people who will support you and help you hold your dream. Who believe in you no matter what. The people who will remind you of your dream when the going gets tough. Protect it, visualize it, affirm it on a daily basis. When doubt’s come in shout no! You can do this outwardly or internally depending on where you are. 🙂
5. Play!! Bring Joyful Play into your life. This will lighten things up and show you that even in the worst of times, you still can have JOY. Joyful Play keeps you filled up and fulfilled. If this is a tough one for you, start with my free playbook and keep an eye out for the next ALCHEMY OF PLAY – IMPACT GROUP in March. I team up with my good friend Jennifer Kartiganer to transform how Joyful Play can impact every aspect of your life, so that you Can achieve your Dreams!

Let yourself dream big, bold, beautiful dreams! Refuse to negotiate them down!

“If you can dream it you can do it!”  ~ Walt Disney